Football

Play Ball!!

Hello and Welcome to the Girls Guide to Fantasy Football!

I am Jordan Zucker, commissioner of the all female League Home Sauce, and female football fan extraordinaire.

I will have weekly updates, advice, and awards after each week of football.

This is our league’s third year. We started out as all first timers and learned how to play together. Now we’re schooling the guys. My team is called Rackstar Molasses in League Home Sauce. Molasses is a nickname given to me by my friend Itzy on a weekend trip up to SF (but NOT because of my driving), and Rackstar is something my friend Amy coined back in 2000 for indeterminate (fine, undisclosed) reasons.

This year I am joining an all male league called No Homers. It is a Simpsons themed league. Not being a huge Simpsons person, (I know), I didn’t have a bevy of ideas for a team name, so I referenced something mentioned to me by this guy I’m not dating. In the “Last Temptation of Homer” episode, Homer is distraught over this huge crush he has on Mindy. He seeks the advice of his friend in a bar and goes “So I have this friend, ah, Joey… Joe Joe… Junior Shabadoo.” The friend goes “That’s the worst name I’ve ever heard!!” Another random guy at the bar starts crying and leaves. The bartender calls after him, “Hey Joey Joe Joe!” It happens to be one of the few episodes I’ve seen so I hence arrived at my team name, Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoos.

I will be doing comparisons on girls vs. boys. Both are 12 team keeper leagues.

Features:

Girls Take/Guys Take (League Home Sauce vs. No Homers)

Awards: Best Man Pile, Best Fatman Dance, Best Ball Scratch, Best Man Hug, Best Primetime Ass Shot

Why choosing by favorite city/best team colors works

Whom League Home Sauce/No Homers is starting next week.

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